Dracula Untold Movie Review

It's no secret, although probably unknown to you all, that I am a huge fan of anything vampire, werewolf or zombie. Well maybe some exceptions. So it seemed only fitting that my first movie review would be on one of the three. My holy grail. The reason I chose Dracula Untold was because it happened to be on TV and it is one of the most recent interpretations of the nefarious blood sucker that I've felt has glimpsed at the man behind the beast even if it did fall short on a few, okay, many accounts. So, let the games begin... (Yes I stole Charles Dance's line. Get over yourselves.)

The movie starts with a narrator, Vlad's son Ingeras played by Art Parkinson, telling us of the legend of Vlad the Impaler. A young Vlad is enslaved and recruited to be trained by the Turks to be unstoppable, unbeatable and unafraid. The ultimate killing machine he ploughs through the years killing on the Sultan's behalf leaving fields of impaled victims. Up until this point the movie is ... well ... on point. The opening scene is shot in such a style as seen in Spartacus (TV series) and 300. In 3D and slow motion. It makes you feel like a ghost shifting through the open battle field with its incredible attention to detail. The build up of this scene is so cleverly thought out that it leaves no space for doubt. From the gruesome sparring of young boys to the battlefield where soldiers flee and unseen force. Until you seen a body projected into the air by a spear and on the other end ... the Impaler Vlad in all his glory adorned with black and red armour boasting a fiery dragon. He is indeed Son of the Dragon.

And then the first sin is committed. Apparently ol' Vlad, played by Luke Evans, is sickened of his murderous ways and returns to his homeland of Transilvania to pursue a more humble life as prince. From there on you can pretty much imagine how the rest of the movie would play out. He goes home, snags a wife, has a son, lives in peace, offers tributes to the Sultan. Life is splendid. Until the Sultan sends a messenger to notify the prince that he demands one thousand and one young boys.

Vlad lacks a lot of things. A list which I could not even begin to make. His reformation and subsequent noble nature just doesn't fit with the image of Dracula. Evans character shows no real emotion. You want emotion? It starts in the eyes. Andy Whitfield shall forever be my favourite actor. When you saw this guy on TV enacting his role as Spartacus you felt everything with him.

Back to the movie ..,

So it's no surprise that Vlad flee's to the aptly named Broken Tooth mountain to ask for the help of the Master Vampire, played by Charles Dance, where he offers Vlad the opportunity to seek his revenge and save his family and the family of those who follow him. But there's a catch. There always is. With this magic blood that Dance's characters so emphatically serves up in a crushed skull Vlad will have three days. And then upon the rise of the fourth sun his powers will be gone. Unless he completes the transformation by drinking human blood.

Vlad goes on to stargaze, transform into bats and almost have some kinky sex with his wife. (Don't get your hopes up nothing ends up happening as Vlad starts to feel the thirst.) He sole handedly massacres a battalion of men and as he continues to defeat the Turks his own people start to question him. Rumours spread of his uncanny ability to defeat such great numbers of soldiers without the aid of any of his own men and soon it is not just the threat of the Turks to be fearful of but of his own people.

The decisive moment in this movie is when his wife, after falling to her death, tells him to drink her blood in order to finish what he started. And I stress she said, "drink my blood". This moment seals his fate as a vehicle for the darkness and also releases the Master from his prison. 

After defeating the Turks and the Sultan Vlad must make the final sacrifice. He hands over his boy to Brother Lucian, who first told him about the Master, and using his magical powers clears the skies in a heroic move to kill off all the people he turned to help him kill all the Turks in turn killing him too.

Is that it?

Nope. Course not. A peasant who became obsessed with Vlad rescues him by giving him his own blood thus allowing him to live on through the years. Fast forward some hundred or so odd years and we see Vlad strolling through a very modern looking London where he once again finds his wife reincarnated. Cue another movie sin ... he baits her with his marriage poem to his first wife and they happily walk off. However the everlasting life and thirst for blood wasn't the only thing that came with the curse. The Master told Vlad he would one day ask for his help to find justice from the one who tricked him and it seems he is finally collecting on his due.

Overall it isn't a bad rendition of the legend of the Impaler. It gave us some back story, gave us a fight, gave us the transformation and all the amazing things that come with becoming a creature of the night but still it failed to really draw us in. You don't feel any of the most basic emotions; anger, sorrow, repentance, joy. We're simply sitting there watching the movie for the sake of it.

I personally would have really enjoyed seeing more of Charles Dance in the movie rather than have him almost like an extra. After all he is vital to the whole story. The movie's motto "Every bloodline has a beginning" is also very misleading as the bloodline as they call it had already originated with the Master. 

Props to the creative department who came up with the movie posters. In particular the one where Evans walks through a field of corpses with his cape disintegrating in the wind into hundreds of bats. The use of bats in general was epic. Which reminds me of one more movie sin. What is it with the weird hand motions when you're using your powers? Especially that final shot of the hand turning into a fist. A bit overplayed eh?

That's my review of the movie. Let me know what you think. Have you seen the movie? Seen any of the other adaptations? If so don't forget to comment on here or on Twitter. 

Misconduct Trailer Review

Secrets and deceptions are rife in the trailer for Misconduct staring Josh Duhamel, Anthony Hopkins and Al Pacino. When a young lawyer gets the breakthrough that could really set his career into motion he finds himself in a sticky situation after getting involved with the woman who brought him the information to take down a major player in the pharmaceuticals field.

This whole movie is eerily reflective of how wrong everything can go when we take things for granted. Such as a young, beautiful, woman showing up with information proving that medical testing gone wrong was covered up in a convenient little USB stick. Or that someone as prominent as Hopkins character would take anything lying down. It speaks to the naivety of a green lawyer looking for his moment in the light. What ensues is a battle of wits between a young lawyer and a cunning tycoon.

But who will win?

The Ones Below Trailer Review

What could be more precious than the birth of a child? The setting scenes in The Ones Below trailer show the happy couple, played by Clemence Poesy and Stephen Campbell Moore, enjoying the new phase of their life with very touching and intimate moments. But things soon start to turn a little creepy when the new neighbour, played by Laura Birn, begins squirming her way into their lives messing with the family unit with her manipulative and deceptive ways.

Many times throughout the trailer you pick up on the subtle tones of fragility and uncertainty of the mother's mind, which is normal after a mother has a child, and the arrival of a younger model is seen in an intimidating light. She represents everything the new mother, played by Poesy, is not at the moment. Where Poesy's character is in recovery from housing a being for nine months the new girl on the block, Birn, is put together, glamorous and a sweetheart. Typical girl next door.

Now hold your pitchforks back TWD fans but David Morrisey is in this new thriller as Birn's love interest Jon. In my perspective his character is an unsuspecting victim unaware of Teresa, Birn's characters, shenanigans.

Both couples are pitted against each other for having what the other desires which will make for a tense atmosphere in the cinema room and will have many speaking about it for a very long time.

For my first thriller review I'm pretty excited and looking forward to watching and reviewing this movie for you. Have a look at the official trailer below and let us know what you think.

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2 (Out Of The Shadows) Trailer Review

They're back! Is it sad that I'm old enough to say I used to watch these guys (minus Megan Fox) when I was a small girl? Damn how time flies. So the gang is back with new villains and a surprise guest and possibly love interest for Megan's character April. As the title suggests these overgrown turtles are coming out to the good people of the city to once again save the day.

While the first few minutes of the trailer are a bit confusing your eyes are caught with the very reminiscent Fast Furious style robbery scene. It's perfect. A squad of synchronised bikers take out a four car detail and then proceed to rob the armoured van. Until they turn on the obnoxious headlights of The Mystery Machine- oh wait it's actually called Tartaruga (Portuguese for turtle).  Oh wait for it ... they play Run DMC's It's Tricky. #WhiteChicksFlashback

SPOILER ALERT

The surprise guest is non other than ... Stephen Amell a.k.a Oliver Queen a.k.a Arrow. He dons a very freaky Jason style outfit but it's nothing to be afraid of. His character Casey Jones. Hockey stick weilding, roller blading, badass he's sporting some new moves and his killer smile.

Oh and we have new mutant creatures in the form of a rhinoceros and a hog with purple mohawks! There isn't much else to comment on at this point other than get ready for more kick ass moves and loads of facepalm moments but enough explosions to keep it interesting. 

Give the trailer a view and let us know your thoughts on Twitter. #Cowabunga #TMNT2

Fantastic Beasts and Where To Find Them Trailer #1 Review

A voice in the dark chants over and over. Trying to conjure light through magic. Twice it sparks before fizzling out. And then the trailer actually starts with the audience thinking, 'Doesn't this feel like a Harry Potter movie?' Well guess what ... it's written by J. K. Rowling.

What's to expect? A mystical yet very boring leather suitcase holding 'magical creatures' yet they aren't as fantastic as the title may suggest. It seems in fact that the main character, only interesting one so far Newt Scamander, played by Eddie Redmayne, has indeed opened Pandora's box.

Yup, that really sums up the F.B.W.T.F.T trailer. That and some fancy wand waving and Harry Potteresque font at the end. I mean really? You couldn't let sleeping dogs lie? Apparently not. From start to end the masterminds behind it seem to have simply taken the success from the Harry Potter movies and inserted that into this barely two minute clip. Heck they even use J. K. Rowling to pull the audience in by asking the audience, on J.K.R's behalf, to return to the wizarding world. 

So what can we expect besides disappointment? I'll save you the time to question my bias by officially stating that I am not a fan of the Harry Potter franchise. Especially when taking into consideration that H.P doesn't die in the end but is graciously resurrected to appease the fans with a happy ending. I could go on and on but I won't. At least not in this review.

One interesting bit of information is that the story in this movie is based some seventy years before Harry Potter reads the book of the same name at Hogwarts. 

Check out the trailer and have your say. I'll probably write a follow up once another trailer is released and don't forget to find me posting about it on Twitter. 

Gods of Egypt Trailer Review

Finally! I found myself squealing in delight when I came across the trailer for this movie. It has been a long time since we have seen the Egyptian gods take the big screen and this recent adaptation doesn't seem like it is going to disappoint. It is so brand spankingly new that there aren't even that many pictures online to fawn over. 

Gerard Butler plays Set, a storm god and of the desert, who overpowers his brother Horus, played by Nikolaj Coster-Waldau, god of war and the sky. With an impressive selection of back up actors and actresses what ensues is a battle of good and evil. Now that my inner child, who was obsessed with studying Archaeology and loved the Mummy, has finished jumping up and down let's address the elephant in the room. 

Many have criticised the movie due to the fact that the so-called Egyptian gods are very un-Egyptian looking like. Donna Dickens, HitFix Managing Editor, very brazenly speculates about the inaccuracy of the movie from the utopian style cities to the blatant geographical issues. Including calling out Hollywood regarding their insistence on "white washing characters". And it's true! Time and time again we've seen Hollywood take historical events, re-create them only to completely destroy the most important characteristics of the people, or in this case Gods, involved. A perfect example would be Butler's very pronounced Scottish accent in the movie Spartacus. 

Besides the heinous crime that is Hollywood we are all still very interested in seeing how this particular movie pans out. Pasty skinned actors aside. The last time we saw this much theatrics with gods and goddesses the likes of War of the Titans and Clash of the Titans were gracing our big screens.

Well, we leave you with the trailer. As ever do let us know what you think over on the good ol' Twitter. Do you think that Hollywood is pushing it too far? Anyone read their public apology?

Martyrs Trailer Review

To start it's a remake and we all know how those tend to go. Next it involves teenage girls, a religious maniac and some hardcore torture. Anybody guess where this is leading? Lots of blood, cheap scares and an even crappier ending.

It's seems to be a recurring theme to give away the juiciest part of the movie within the two minute trailer which means that when you actually watch the movie you end up watching tones of boring dialogue or worse scenes where the villains stare endlessly into the screen.

The back story, or what we know so far, is that two girls band together on a quest for answers and yes, you guessed it, revenge against those who brutally tortured them and abused them as children. Troian Bellisario takes centre stage as the main protagonist and so far her acting skills consist of screaming, more screaming, looking scared and more screaming. 

"They just couldn't leave it alone."

Martyrs holds the potential to look into the true darkness behind religion yet there isn't much hope for this movie. Or the remake of it. Props to the religious maniac, a.k.a old lady,for her narration throughout the trailer. 

Have a look at the trailer and let us know what you think. Have you watched the original? Tweet us using hashtag #SacrificeForKnowledge.